The Game

Why do I find it completely repulsive when guys hit on me over the internet? Like... dude, I have never met you nor do I intend to; especially after this. I guess I'm just old fashioned thinking that it's better to actually meet someone in person FIRST. The internet isn't my freaking life dude nor do I plan to make it. I am a compulsive Montreat Mail checker and whatnot. Not my fault.

OH, and another thing, do you people not see that I am very happily taken? I try to post that crap everywhere and creepers are still out there creeping.

p.s. this only happens once in a blue moon. Trust me, I'm not as hot as it sounds.

Anyways, so I guess I'm not as helpless lately. Or maybe I hide it well... who knows?

I am just getting better about handling my emotions. The only thing that really bothers me nowadays is the fact that I CANNOT get music theory for my life. It is very hard for me to admit I need help and get tutored. That I have been doing (very big deal) and it's still not working. I just don't get it and it breaks my heart. I cry about once a day about it but it's okay. It's not the end of the world. Usually my friends cheer me up anyway. They're always so happy to see me. :D Loves it.

Did you know they started quoting me when I'm not there? How cute!!!

They're such cute babygirls.

There are a few people here that I want to seriously maim. They anger me to the point I can't stand it. Their ignorance is unbearable. It's seriously surprising.

Speaking of surprises, I really enjoy my New Testament class. Let alone are all of my friends in there but it's so wonderful to get an intelligent conversation going about the Bible. Especially since I'm not well educated in that area while everyone else is. It makes me feel inferior at times but it's okay. MC makes everything better. Ahaha.

Well this is a lame entry that I really shouldn't be writing. I just felt like getting that little rant out about this creeper. I wish I looked older.

It’s the end of the world as we know it…

I really feel like I have just given up. The other day in choir, my teacher was talking after prayer about how he can see that this is the second semester and people have already given up. I am definitely one of those people. He was talking about how we need to persevere through everything and keep that momentum we had in the beginning. For me, that’s really hard to do. Like I said before, I feel like I have just given up and there’s no turning back from this.

I just don’t feel like doing much of anything anymore. I have homework that has been piling up for days, so many things that are expected of me and I do none of it. Well, I guess I kind of do some of it half-assed only because I know it NEEDS to be done. It’s just, I don’t have the zest I used to have coming here. I still like the place and people, my attitude towards school in general is not the same. I keep trying to talk to people about it but it never comes out right. I try talking to Wesley but he is always having his own problems nowadays and nothing matters but that. It’s whatever. I feel like that part of my life is falling through too but that’s a whole new tangent I just don’t feel like going on.

I just don’t feel anything anymore. I am completely apathetic to everything.

Everyone thinks it’s a bad thing. I’m a little worried about it but at the same time, who cares?